So…I’ve been avoiding my blog.

As I was procrastinating today on the Internet after a particularly long tattoo session on my boyfriend’s sister before she goes to be stationed in Japan for two years, I once again found myself drawn to the ever-amazing Hyperbole and a Half. It fills me with joy. xD I was there looking for a particular picture to help my friend visualize me crawling on the floor towards my laundry in a bout of laziness (which I found), and then I began reading one of my favorite posts, entitled ‘This is Why I’ll Never Be an Adult’.

When I first read it a couple years ago, I found the concept hilarious, and I loved her illustrations! Going back to it now, as an adult, with my own place, pets, and responsibilities…it all became clear.

I get it. AND I AM THAT. Her post was accurate down to the nachos, which I found myself eating for breakfast alongside a piece of pumpkin pie, because, as I mentioned above, I was feeling so lazy that I couldn’t even put clothes away, let alone cook myself food. Plus, I didn’t want to mess up the kitchen counters that I had cleaned about 5 days ago…also I didn’t want to add another saucepan or skillet to the growing pile of non-dishwasher-safe dishes in the sink that I choose to not remember when I think about the nice clean counters.

 

Now to the point of this post. I read about a part that struck a particular chord with me:  the guilt that comes with shirking one’s responsibilities for so long that it feels worse to do them because you’ve waited so long than it does to continue shirking.

This is how I’ve felt about my blog! When I started it, I was all excited and felt responsible, knowledgeable, and hip! I was adding content daily, trying to adhere to the specific topic of art and imagination. Yeah well, HAVING IMAGINATION ALL THE TIME IS HARD. I bitch about it constantly at work, because I have to draw for other people day in and day out, and I rarely have time to be creative for myself. So who am I to preach to you guys about creativity?

I suppose at first, I had hoped it would inspire me to be more creative, posting things that inspired me, and that in doing so, I might inspire others so that they didn’t feel the same funk as I did when it came to having an imagination. Instead, I felt guilty when I had nothing to post. I felt guilty for not feeling in a creative mood. That’s stupid. I would get an urge to post…but then it would be off-topic, and I wanted my blog to have a purpose! A narrow, specific purpose that I could focus on. Yeah well, BEING FOCUSED IS STUPID. xD

…it’s not, it’s a good thing, but it’s really tough for me. You get what I mean.

Last time I kept a blog, I had a Livejournal. I posted on it every day because I was just speaking my thoughts, or I’d do one of those quiz things where it tells you what flavor of tea you’d be, or what element, or which bodily organ. I wasn’t restricted, and it felt great.

SO, I was thinking about taking this blog into a more natural direction, because I do want to keep doing it…and maybe THAT will keep my creativity up, and I won’t feel so pressed for time to write something prolific and meaningful any time I post. Maybe I’m not ready for a super adult, focused blog yet.

What do you guys think? What kind of blog do you have, and how do you maintain yours? Is it stressful or relaxing, time-consuming?

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